Hi. I'm the Problem, It's Me? 7 Ways to Recognize Anxiety in Yourself

Did you know it isn't always easy to tell if you have anxiety? You might be thinking, "I've never had a panic attack or taken anxiety medication, so I definitely don't have that shit." 

Just because you haven't had a panic attack, that doesn't mean it may not be something you contend with. At Karrie Out Loud, we strive to help women come to terms with their anxiety while learning healthy coping mechanisms so they can embrace this as you special superpower!

Part of that process is shifting the cultural narrative away from the stigmatized ideas about anxiety. It is so much much more than a clinical diagnosis, and for those of us living with high-functioning anxiety, it's much harder to recognize the hold it can take on our lives. High-functioning anxiety isn't technically a diagnosis. It is a series of traits that can be triggered by trauma, ADHD, a family history of anxiety and a few other circumstances.

So let's just dive on into the topic since it is Mental Health Awareness Month. I'm sharing seven ways to recognize anxiety in yourself so you can begin to understand how the many facets of your life and mental health may be affected.

Let's get started!

Constant Worrying

Everybody worries. It's part of life, right? There are times when it's productive to worry, but those with anxiety find this to be a chronic, daily issue. You may spend time worrying about money, your family's safety, projects at work, having intrusive thoughts out of nowhere or simply driving your car on the freeway because what if? 

When worrying is a constant and starts to disrupt your everyday life, it's time to figure out some coping mechanisms. If you don't address these feelings, they will only grow.

Needing Reassurance

You just finished a project at work but didn't immediately get encouraging feedback. Panic strikes.  You are sure they hated it. How did that make you feel? Are you able to feel satisfied and accomplished for the work you did, or are you worried that no feedback means you did something wrong? 

If you have anxiety, you will dwell on negative thoughts or even freak out a bit until someone gives you some reassurance. You'll let your imagination run wild and feel better once someone gives you a pat on the back. When you are anxious about something and can't let it go unless somebody else reassures you, that's a sign you should seek help with your anxiety. 

Working on finding validation within yourself is possible, I promise! And it's ok to seek reassurance! It is when you constantly need it for everything you do, say or accomplish that it becomes an issue and could be an indicator of anxiety driving the car. That's part of the reason I founded Women Out Loud. You aren't crazy for feeling worried all the time or concerned you aren't living up to your potential. It is part of being an anxious human and there is a lot you can do about it. I cannot begin to tell you how many women I am in community with who feel those feelings. It isn't just a you thing. And we'll help you get to the root of it so you can live a more peaceful life.

Overthinking

Let's keep going down this road. Needing constant assurance is a sign you're a textbook overthinker. Even when you've crossed your t's and dotted your i's, you still catch yourself asking, "WHAT IF I FUCKED IT UP??" 

What if they didn't like my presentation? They said they did, but what if they were just being nice? They are probably lying to me to make me feel better.

What if I left my curling iron on? I remember turning it off, but what if I'm wrong? 

My kids seem happy, but what if they're having a hard time at school and just don't want to tell me?

Overthinking can lead to worrying and feeling like the loud voice in your head just won't give you a break. You may be adding extra stress to your life if the examples above hit close to home.

Lack of Patience

I used to jokingly say, "Patience is a virtue...I do not possess."

Now I totally get why. Isn't it easier said than done? Patience is something everyone struggles with. Believe me, once I've been on the phone with my cell phone provider for more than 20 minutes, I want to throw my phone across the room. Not really, but you get the gist.

Some of our impatient impulses are harder to ignore— especially with anxiety. 

Suppose you find yourself getting angry and antsy if the waiter hasn't been by to deliver your bill even though you finished your meal ten minutes ago. Almost everyone has felt that way, but do you find this happening almost daily, or do you seem to get more upset than those around you? If you are nodding your head while reading this, it could be a sign that facing your anxiety could help you live more peacefully day to day.

Procrastination + Avoidance

When we are feeling anxious about an upcoming event, project, or even phone call, a little voice in our head raises its hand to say, "Hey, what if we just don't do it?" The worse our anxiety gets, the louder that voice gets. It can feel easier to avoid a situation altogether or put off our work until the last minute. 

Procrastination and avoidance are definitely coping mechanisms— just not the healthy kind. They are usually brought on board by their bestie, perfectionism! At the moment, ignoring an important phone call may help you get through the day. But you're really just creating more problems for yourself in the long run. This is totally anxiety 101.

Physical Effects

Even if you've never experienced a full-blown panic attack, sneaky signs of anxiety often manifest physically. Sweating more than usual in an uncomfortable situation, trouble sleeping, increased heart rate, heavy breathing, lower back pain and stomach problems are par for the course. 

It's NOT in your head. 

Anxiety triggers stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline which causes your heart rate to increase. That causes your blood to pump more quickly, and your breathing may increase but become more shallow. That is never a fun feeling.

General stomach pain, irritable bowel syndrome, constipation, and other digestive problems have been linked to anxiety as well. Good times, my sisters. Good times.

Panic Attacks

Let's talk about the big one. You likely already know panic attacks are a symptom of anxiety. However, many people don't always recognize a panic attack when they experience one. Often times, you will feel like you are sure you are having a heart attack.

A panic attack is a short period, or episode, of an intense, quick rush of anxiety. It causes the physical sensation of fear. Imagine someone chasing you. It would cause things like a racing heartbeat, shortness of breath, shaking, muscle tension, intense fear and dizziness. You may feel physically ill and afraid. The only thing is... nobody is actually chasing you. You are standing on the soccer field or a the supermarket. You are under no threat at all. They can be terrifying and could last for a few seconds, a few minutes, or up to half an hour. 

Because the symptoms and duration of panic attacks vary so much, some people don't recognize them for what they are.

It should also be noted that panic attacks aren't necessarily an indicator of chronic anxiety. Anyone might experience a panic attack during an extremely stressful situation. For example, an adolescent may have a panic attack before an important exam if they are feeling excessive pressure to do well. Teens may have one after a bad breakup. Adults dealing with trauma, losing a loved one, or a significant life change could experience a panic attack. 

The bottom line is this: any one of us could experience a panic attack in our lifetime. Up to 35 percent of people will experience a panic attack. But if this is a frequent occurrence for you, or if it's not easy to determine the cause of a panic attack, you should reach out for help. There are sooo many resources. More than you can imagine.

Anxiety is a common mental health concern affecting people of all ages and backgrounds (more than you know!) It can impact daily life and relationships, but individuals can learn to manage and overcome so many things associated with their anxiety, especially with the proper support and tools. The community I've created at Women Out Loud can be your go-to for support and resources. You'll get advice on topics ranging from self-soothing techniques to finding the right therapist. Join us!